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Monday, 6 October 2008

The one with... and the story unfolds.

This is a follow up from my previous entry.. :)

I know that it’s not like I owe you guys an explanation and whatnot, but somehow I would like to share with you guys here (and more like jotting this down for remembrance sake later in the future) on how 'the decision' was made… =)

For those who knows me and who has been reading my blog for quite sometime, you would probably have noticed how I have been contemplating on the mantra -- to engage, not to engage, since… forever. The ambiguity came about merely on the basis -- as far as my religion is concerned, an engagement doesn’t change anything to the relationship (the halal haram wise). Hence, I kept on second-guessing myself why would I want to incur both of my time & money on something what seems to me, unnecessary..

However, I don’t deny the fact on the important aspect of getting engaged as well.. From what I see, being engaged somehow serves as a first taste of being committed.. Which is essential to a couple yang still 'berdarah muda', perhaps like me.. You know, senang nak emo, always wanting an easy way out when having an argument, and etc.. :P

Long grampa gramma story short, let’s fast forward to 6 August 2008 -- my 26th birthday.

So the touching ‘birthday present’ I mentioned there in my entry was…. no, not that I was told that we will be getting engaged… Rather, for the first time ever, Kerol initiated a ‘serious’ conversation with his mother, about us.. You know, 'the conversation' kind..

Why oh yes, it’s a big deal to him, and to me too.. I mean, both of our parents know that we are an item -- we’ve gone past the meet-the-parents moments and have been to each other house already.. And we could roughly tell that the parents somehow approve our relationship.. Well, for a fact, the two families have even spent a vacation together.. (Well, actually that was the first, and somehow the last [as for now], that the two families actually met.. Heh.).

BUT. Having said that, Kerol has actually never managed to bring himself to tell his mother, “Oh omak kahwin kan aku…”.. :P You know, that kind of talk. And that, somehow has been a constant point of argument in the relationship.. *iSk*. That’s why, when he did that on my birthday, I felt so touched.. Really, it meant damn a lot to me… =)

So that’s that, nothing happened thereafter. It was fine to me, because I was still unsure as to whether should we be getting engaged first or skip that part; and go straight to the wedding business (which was not decided also..yet). But we can’t just push aside the rich adat resam in the Muslim culture; therefore a merisik is somehow already there in the whole agenda. Sometime in mid August, Kerol’s family proposed a date (which is 19 October) to have the merisik ceremony.. to which my family agreed... =)

BUT. Who knows, me mama actually (secretly) has a wish to see Kerol & I got engaged! She wanted the engagement be held on the same day of the nikah (solemnization) day. I didn’t quite like that idea… I mean, macam rimas je??? Nak kena fikir hantaran, attire, location, etc etc for both engagement and wedding solemnization PLUS wedding reception, ALL at one go? No no no, I don’t think so… Nak tengok I get all moody boleh la.. (I get rimas pretty easily thank you very much).

So that somehow concludes, we are getting engaged, but on the same day with the merisik ceremony… There you go, a win-win situation…. ;)

OK so then came the preparation part before the 19 October.

Did I mention that I can get all agitated very easily? So yeah, it’s NOT easy to actually doing all the preps while being so tied up with work… Sheesshhh.. Ini baru engagement, I can’t imagine myself preparing for my wedding later… Huhu.

Anyway, coming back to my merisik + engagement day -- ideally, I yearn for a simple yet very memorable ceremony (hence less prep works & ka-ching involved). I'm somehow hoping that at the end of the day, I would be able to brag and shout to everyone out there, a very simple ceremony is yes, do-able. So initially, both Kerol & I agreed, there will be no hantarans (except for the ring & sirih junjung), there will be no fancy2 stuff, there will be no khemah whatsoever, no door gift --- in a nutshell, it’s gonna be a very simple family-affair kind of event.

Nevertheless, with each passing days as more and more family members are informed, and somehow involved in the whole process, things got stretched from simple.. to.. too much? Well, I wouldn’t say ‘too much’ per se la, more like ‘too much’ the way I define it; which is still ‘simple’ to the definition of some other people..

That’s the reason why my fasting month went all hay wired a bit (note: drama queen alert). I got so tied up.. What with the workloads, and having to prepare for the day as well. Our families are relatively small, especially my side. So we haven’t had much experience in dealing with this kind of thing. You can see how my mom goes all blurry, not knowing what to do and where to start also.. Heh.

But like what Kerol told me, let’s not get too stressed out.. He wanted me to be enjoying every moment of the preps stage… So I hang on to his words, whenever I sensed the panicky hormones coming.. :P

All in all, I would say, almost 80% is almost there already.. My deepest gratitude goes to my mom (for helping me to coordinate some of the things), my sister Erin & her friends (for doing the hantarans & deco), and some other close friends (for the useful pointers). And most importantly, thanks to you dear Kerol, for being the lovely you..as always... (Together now, awwwwww... :P)

Really. Thanks so much. I'd never thought I can pull out such prep works, if it's not without these people.. True, I haven't yet to see the outcome.. But suffice to say, I am all happy and satisfied already..

Let’s just hope everything will turn out just nice and fine on the day… :)

(Gosh ni baru nak merisik & bertunang, god knows how long my entry goes when it comes to my wedding later… Talking about the drama queen traits in me eyh? :P)

Whatever it is, as for now.. I have got myself to deal with -- yeap, past few days only it hit me that, hey, I’m getting attached to someone soon!! So I got all jittery just by the thought of it, hence the sleepless night too… Yaiks!! I mean, I've never thought that I'd ever reach this stage of life... And now that it's coming, everything feels... so.. surreal.. You get what I mean? That's the main reason why I've been putting it on hold for a while before I give it a shout to the whole world.. (Trust me, it is not about Kerol.. This is actually me having my thinking-too-much plus drama-queen buttons ON, all at the same time! Huhu…I SO need a chill pill ya?)

Okie dokie peeps.. I guess that'd be all.

The clock is ticking! Wish me all the best ya… :)

Till later~*

17 comments:

  1. soo...can i upload all hantaran's pictures?
    hehehe...

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  2. guess-who-am-i-?October 06, 2008 3:54 pm

    oohhh.... baru tau... hehe...

    so u are having "engagement jitters" eyh? nanti when the time for wedding, the jitters will be more bearable i hope...

    in the meantime, enjoy the preparation time... jgn stress²

    wishing you all the best =)

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  3. ~liza~,

    thanks liza!! xoxo.

    erin adikku,

    NO.. NO.. NOPE.. (to the tune of Amy Winehouse..) :P

    ReplyDelete
  4. congrats lia !!!

    b bole imagine how excited u r....:)

    trust me....the moment bakal mak mertua datang nk sarung cincin sgt2 nervous hehehe rase mcm nak nikah plak hahaha mase time bb dulu la

    ReplyDelete
  5. hi stranger,

    err.. i couldnt guess la.. siape ek? anyway whatever it is, thanks for the words of comfort :)

    bb,

    thank u!!! :)

    itu lah.. aritu lia tengok balik bb punye gmbr tunang.. siap pakai inai eh??? hehehe...

    anyway, am really counting days now... :P

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  6. lia dearie,

    CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!! am very very very happy for you!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Lilia! Congratulations!! :)

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  8. oh lia..

    congrats..teringat masa aku tunang dulu :P (nak jugak menyibok!)

    dah tunang cepat2 kawen!
    nnt jd cam aku yg tetiba rasa x mo kawen..
    hish..camne tuh..

    ReplyDelete
  9. wey apsal komeng aku slm xmasuk ..

    anyway, kalau kau kawen nnt xtau laaaa bape kali kau akan call aku. xpe, aku sedia membantu .. ;)

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  10. looks like i need to prep up my camera skills for the big day..still free of charge as mentioned hehe..

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  11. ms. happy lili@ :)October 07, 2008 3:57 pm

    puan abot,

    thanks dear!! :) am 1000x happier. heh.

    deera,

    thanks deera ;)

    iyma,

    oh iyma.. thank you thank you..

    haish ade pulak dah takmo kawen... aritu siap dah sssopping sssakan kat bandung? :) am sure the excitement will rise sOON closer to the actual wedding day!

    make sure ko document down all the steps taken untuk wedding preps k.. leh aku copy & paste jer nanti buat guidance ;)

    farah gatai miang,

    lerrr mane aku nak tau dddonnggg~*

    hahaha calculative siut!!! tu lah sape soh ko tak bukukan siap2 all the steps you took mase buat preparation? ni tyme aku call baru terhegeh2 nak response satu satu.. :)

    ye, nanti tyme kawen aku try tak call ko.. takut nanti ko claim aku TIRU pulak KANNNN... buwek~* :P

    joe,

    oh yeah.. haha.. yup yup.. we can nego later.. i can get you to take photo on the W day FOC.. but what about the finished products eh? album, frame and all?? hmmmm..

    ReplyDelete
  12. To lilia & kerol, tahniah & stay cool babe

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  13. Li@,

    Dah nak tunang? Bestnyer...Congrats...I agree with what you said, engagement is the
    1st step towards commitment. I'm so happy for you girl....

    Do post some pictures nanti, kay...

    ReplyDelete
  14. hehe li@..
    aku akan bg ko satu buku wedding preparation aku nnt..diulangi..satu buku! :P
    pasti ko akan rimas giler nnt..byk benda remeh..duh..tu buat aku tetiba fed up..but like u said, maybe the excitement will rise soon..

    eheh..aku bleh byg muka ko happy..
    :P

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  15. lilia lalingggggg...

    tahniahhhhhhh..sory lmbt wish. anyway, best tunang ni, nanti ko dah tunang baru ko tau.

    hip hip hooray for lilia!! :)

    aku doakan yang baik2 aje utk kau. congrats cutie pie.

    ReplyDelete
  16. to anonymous,

    thanks you! :)

    ziez,

    ohhh thank you thank you :) yup will sure do put up pictures later.. hehehe.

    oh iyma,

    wahhh bagus bagus... ade buku panduan, yeay!! hmmm rimas2 kendian cite lah. kasik aku rimas nak go through engagement dulu.. hehehe.

    mase ko nak engage dulu pun sure happy kan? so rest assured the feelings will be the same come ur wedding time too..

    dalie dalink,

    hehehe best eh? can't wait! :)

    thanks hotness.

    ReplyDelete