Pages

Saturday, 30 December 2006

The one with.. the Singapore trip (part 2) and the loss of my beloved opah..

*continuation from previous entry :p *

Day 4 – Harini dari pagi dah ujan.. tak sure la dari pagi ker tak, sebab bangun2 jer memang tengah hujan. heh. hmm, after everyone was all ready, we went to err, Orchard Road again coz Alin n Tazz wanted to do a little bit more of shopping.. (yup!!) and after that we went to this place called Clarke Quay. was quite a happening place i would say. in view of the Christmas Eve, they even had a live band performance there. Tazz went to try their bungee jumping (erghh kasik sejuta pun i wont take my chance.. huhu) and later Alin, Tazz and myself went for a boat tour (Dayana phobia boat2 kecik macam tuh, dia prefer cruise jer.. lol). after that we went for a nice dinner where we talked, and laughed, and we had.. more of talking and laughing :D and also had our christmas toast when the midnight strikes..



.: walaupun ujan, keluar tetap keluar… :) :.

.: inside one of the shopping mall, outside this one outlet with Dayana sementara tunggu cik Alin & cik Tazz underwent their retail theraphy session, heh :.

.: at the entrance of Clarke Quay:.


.: Tazz during the boat tour.. gambar dia bungee jumping takde.. video is too big to be attached here :.

.: Dinner on Christmas Eve :.

Day 5 – more of the go with the flow day.. masing2 sume dah pancit coz hari2 berjalan and tidur lambat. went out quite late towards the evening and the first place we went was Arab Street.. haihhhh kalau earning in SGD kain2 kat sane memang murah… sabar jer lah tengok kain2 cantik kat situ. after that, Alin, Tazz and myself went to the Night Safari without Dayana tagging along sebab dia dah pergi yang lagi challenging kat Afrika.. :) Night Safari was great, even the fact that was already my third time being there. heh, like Alin said, it’s the company that matters.. tapi the night creatures performance had to be cancelled due to the rain.. bummer.. kitorg punye lah berjaya mencelah2 throughout the crowd (coz its on the first come first served basis) and managed to get a good sitting.. tapi, takpelah kan..nak buat cemane.. nevertheless, was a great outing…

.: inside one of the shops at the Arab Street :.

.: me at the entrance of Night Safari :.


.: Cik Alin had a thing with Encik buaya darat :P :.

.: Cik Tazz berlagak dengan Encik buaya darat ;P :.


.: me berdrama queen dengan Encik buaya darat hehe :.

Went back home that night at about 11pm, close to midnight. we were supposed to have a meet up with Alin’s sis – Azera and the bf. they drove in to Singapore so we thought of passing her some of our shopping bags so that it would be easier for us to travel by bus later.. so, Azera and her bf Faliq came to Dayana’s house, and without planning, we decided to go to this one agak-famous-la-jugak shopping market, Mustaffa (nvm the name kekeke). it opens 24 hours, and since it was our final night in Singapore, we decided to give it a shot. i myself actually have already formed a bad expectation towards that place sebab the last time i passed by that place, to me it looked like none other than Mydin, packed with Indians & Bangladeshi.. huhu.. tapi Dayana and family memang promote abis2an laa tempat tuh, coz barang murah. so, Azera, Faliq, Alin, Tazz & myself went there at about 1 in the morning.. ok lah, i surrender, that place wasnt that bad.. barang murah laa gak.. tapi i was already so sleepy, so macam tak amek pusing sangat…

after that we went for a late dinner, and reached home at about 5am.

thats when i received an sms from my sister, telling me, that my beloved opah had passed away earlier at 4.15am… i was like, so broken down into pieces, that i cried and cried and cried.. and all i know was, i wanted to rush back to Port Dickson, by whatever means.

thanks to the continuous support from Dayana & family, Alin, and Tazz, i managed to catch the 8am bus from Singapore to Malacca that very morning, and when i reached there at about 1.30pm, i managed to get a cab to rush me to PD. along the way i just couldnt stop crying for i fear not being able to see my late opah for the very last time. i was on sms with Erin my sister all the time to keep updated and also on sms with Kerol to calm me down.

and really, thank God, i reached PD just nice to join the rest to mandikan arwah. that was my first time dealing with the death of the closed ones… i tried to be strong, but once in a while i couldnt help it from breaking down into tears… i just couldnt believe my eyes that opah dah tak ada… paling sedih was seeing atuk.. atuk terkilan, coz dia cerita, that very night, arwah ajak atuk tidur skali… (atuk normally sleeps in a separate room).. and when arwah requested for that, it was still early.. about 9 pm like that.. so atuk lepak dulu depan TV, and fallen asleep without realizing it.. bile dia terjaga dalam pukul 4.15 pagi tu, dia masuk bilik, he saw opah was still lying in bed, and her hand was in the position of trying to reach the-supposedly-next-to-her atuk.. when atuk touched her hand…it was already cold.. tapi atuk kata leher arwah still warm.. but still, arwah dah takde by then.. kesian sangat tengok atuk…

nevertheless, everything went on smoothly that day. arwah selamat dikebumikan kat Tanah Perkuburan Islam Lukut after Asar. kenduri tahlil selamat diadakan 3 hari berturut2.. thanks Kerol for coming over to give a helping hand.. and thanks friends, for the heartfelt wishes...

if i were to be asked, yes, sampai sekarang terbayang2 lagi the late opah, dari mase dia terlantar sakit, sampai mase dia dah nak dikebumikan.. arwah sakit tak lama, dalam sebulan setengah macam tu kot.. and that is so.. tears triggering…

semoga arwah opah ditempatkan di tempat orang2 yang beriman.. dan semoga roh arwah dicucuri rahmat…

Al-Fatihah…


.: katil arwah, tinggal kenangan.... :.

Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Adha....

Friday, 29 December 2006

The one with..the Xmas Gifts Xchange dinner & the Singapore trip (part 1)..

its 2am and i’m still awake. i’ve just finished having 5 sticks of chicken satays and two glasses of ice-cream soda.. hemm, memang takleh tido laa jawabnye. normally other people bile dah kenyang bleh tido kan, but that doesnt happen to me.

anyway, its been a week since i last updated my blog. and within that one whole week, a lot of things happened in my life. i shall start from the beginning…

20/12/2006 – Xmas Dinner

had a dinner with my colleagues at Atlantis Seafood Restaurant in Damansara Perdana. there were 16 of us; myself & Kerol, parveen & bf who just came back from China – Ryan, Jean, Ruben, Eddie & wife Siew Shan, Adrian & gf Phoebe, Joe Boy & gf (cant remember the name), Kristy, Angela, Jasmine, and Patricia. poor thing Joanne couldnt join us due to work requirement. anyhow, we went there after work and i cant really remember exactly what we had, but it was such a great selection of seafood dishes, reasonably priced. after ourselves were really stuffed with good food, we started to come out with ideas on how the xmas gift xchange thing should be done. in the end we agreed to draw lots. we put in names in a bowl and started to pass around. funny thing was everyone was like wishing and hoping that they wont get Jean’s pressie because initially she didnt want to participate but decided to bring something in the end. she was like walking around during the office hour earlier the day and showing off to people how proud she was being able to buy ‘something’ at the very last minute and all of us was sort of can tell that the ‘something’ looked rather some kind of junky stuff. haha. and Parveen, being the ‘lucky’ ones, picked Jean’s name not only once, but twice!! haha.. and as guessed, it was few packs of fragranced condoms. lol. nevertheless, it was such a great dinner..



.: tak sempat nak tangkap gambar the food before being eaten. tau2 jer dah after. heh. :.


.: Kerol and the yummy crab :.


.: Joe Boy tengah picking names :.



.: Parveen kecewa dapat hadiah Jean.. :D :.


.: I myself got a nice mug from Angela ;) :.

21/12/2006 till 26/12/2006 – trip to Singapore with my girlfriends :))))

there was a saying, “old friends remind of who you were once, and new friends bring out the hidden you..” To me, these girlfriends of mine fit both categories ;) Alin, Dayana, and Tazz were my friends when we had our form 1 to 3 education in mrsm Terendak. i then left for mrsm Taiping and hence ever since parted with them physically but somehow, someway, or another; we are still close at heart. i guess the teen life we explored together once binding us really tight, and i am so glad that we can still click despite of the different hectic life we lead and live in.

Dayana’s parents are working in Singapore (read: means they have a place to stay there *wink*), so setelah sekian lama omong2 kosong, finally we managed to merealisasikan the plan to go Singapore. some others cant make it, so it was down to Alin, Tazz and myself. Dayana was already there since the start of the school holiday, so three of us joined her later.

hmm, its gonna be one whole freaking long entry, i’ll try to make it short and simple.. ;P

Day 1 - Alin & myself went there first on the 21st December coz Tazz was only manage to get her leaves approved starting 22nd December onwards. Alin & myself departed from Corus Hotel at Jalan Ampang by bus as early as 8 in the morning and reached Singapore at about 1 pm. Dayana was already there waiting for us. we were like so excited seeing each other like we’ve never met before. heh. punyalah susah nak gather in KL, alih2 kat Singapore jugak berjumpe. :) Dayana brought us to her (damn nice & big) house and we settled down. not long after that, Dayana’s mom asked us to join for lunch, and after that, without even getting ourselves changed, tanpa berlengah lagi, to Orchard Road we went! hari first jer dah (ter) shopping. haihhhh… :P we went in and out of one shopping mall after another and went back only at almost midnight. Orchard Road had such a nice view at night. penuh ngan christmas trees and bling bling lightings. kire cam happening jugak laa.. we chatted until 4 in the morning before going out to pick Tazz at the bus station.
.: me & Dayana :.


.: Alin & Dayana towards the end of the day – penat tapi happy :.

.: ‘hasil tangkapan’ hari pertama :P :.

Day 2 – Hari kedua we went to the Orchard Road (yup again!). kali ni hasil tangkapan laaaagi banyak. uwaaa!! i tried to control tapi nak wat cemane kan, dah rezeki… *eceh* even hujan pun (yup, kat Singapore pun ujan.. bummer) tak mampu nak prevent us from going 'tawaf' the whole stretch of Orchard Road :P

.: Dayana yang tak plan nak shopping pun TERshopping :.


.: ‘rezeki’ hari kedua lol :.



.: me & Tazz in front of one of the many christmas trees :.

Day 3 – we went to Sentosa Island! was such a tiring day, yet a memorable ones. hemm, i guess i’ll just let the pictures say it all… :P

.: posing while waiting for our turn to hop into the cable car that’s gonna bring us to the Sentosa Island :.

.: Alin & myself in the cable car. me sebenarnye tengah kontrol jer muke tuh… huhu… scared of height laaa. gayat! :.


.: first stop – Underwater World :.

.: second stop – Cinemania. mase ni tengah beratur. ramai giler manusia, kate school holiday and it was Saturday some more. tapi its really worth queuing. best! :.

.: third stop – skyrides. again, was such a thrill (scary) experience for me.. huhu :.


.: forth stop – dolphin lagoon. ade dolphins show and Tazz was lucky enough to be called upon out of the crowd and got the chance to spend some time with the dolphin. yang kiss Tazz tu name dia Splash. awwww :.


.: sixth stop – Siloso beach. before that we actually went to the Trapeze place, Tazz nak try. but unfortunately she didnt get her shot for she was all wet after spending time with Splash. next time yea Tazzm :) :.


.: seventh stop – 4D virtual reality cinema :.


.: eighth stop – the Merlion place (half mermaid & half lion, tapi tak sempat nak kaji plak the history behind it). susah giler nak setting camera at night to get a nice shot :.


.: ninth stop – musical fountain show.. hermm time ni pun susah nak get a nice shot :.

it was already late when we left Sentosa Island. itu pun tak sume tempat kitorg cover. well, at least next time datang tau la nak timing betul2 kan. anyway after that we went to Esplanade, took some more pictures, before having a late dinner at the restaurant near Dayana’s house…

adehhh..penatnyer..

*to be continued then* ;)

Wednesday, 20 December 2006

The one with the normal wednesday, but feels like its friday.. :P

i draw this picture for Kerol this morning (*wink*), but for public purposes, i modified this a bit.. :P



i'm sharing my love with the people around me - my family, my significant other, and my friends..of which i'm receiving the loves from these people in return as well :) may all of us living a happy life, and will always be blessed...

the year 2006 is coming to an end soon, and comes to us the year 2007. we've seen the passing of another year. for many it's been filled with pain and tears. but there have been times in this past year, that certain events have brought us cheer. may the coming year be full of hope, and may we be given the strength to cope.

merry christmas, selamat hari raya haji & happy new year!

Tuesday, 19 December 2006

The one with...and old friend of mine..

earlier today i received an sms from Ashra, my high school friend. i was puzzled when she told me that our friend, Fadzli @ Bulu passed away today from an accident. a motorcycle accident. innalillah…

like i said, i was so mystified to receive such a news. Fadzli used to be my friend when we studied in mrsm Terendak way back in 1995. we were friends due to the fact that he was (then) one of my bestfriend, Hud’s boyfriend. we were not so close, but sometimes during semester break, we did hang out at the national library with some other friends of ours as well. and sometimes he would call me to talk about Hud. he was in fact already so much involved in the motorbike racing and all at such a very young age, and had few experiences in motorbike accident too. *sigh*

and we lost contact when i moved to mrsm Taiping in 1998, and he himself didnt continue his studies in mrsm. cant remember also when he actually broke up with Hud. but then once in a blue moon, he’d still call me when i was in uitm. and i did see him in a very few occasions held for us Terendakians. i think the last time he called me was some time before Raya this year, he was asking me about the raya sale held in KL. i didnt really entertain his call for it was made during office hour and i was in fact at the client’s office. he continued with the sms. we ended after 3 – 4 smses. and apparently, that was the last time i ever heard from him…

semoga roh beliau dicucuri rahmat. Al-Fatihah...

The one with the holiday mood...

yes, i am so on holiday mood already.. huhu.. been progressing so slow with work yesterday and today.. let alone tomorrow lah kan.. haha. most of the managers are all on leaves already, so yeahhhh.. ape lagi kan.. pagi tadi masuk office kul 9 pun ade tiga org jer, itu pun tiga2 new staff.. haha.. haihhh i’m really asking for trouble lah kan. kalau keja tak siap seriously am gonna suffer next year when i come back to office. tapi nak buat cemane kan, i am just being human. a normal ones.. :P

yesterday i went to KLCC with Kerol after work. he accompanied me to survey for the christmas gift and i finally bought something, which i think quite nice.. we shall see.. *grin* tomorrow night i am gonna have a dinner at this one seafood restaurant at Damansara Perdana PJ, with my colleagues.. and we will be having the pressie exchange session as well. Kerol will be coming along since everyone elses also will bring partners. what a way of ending the working days in year 2006 huh =)

and the next day nyer, am going to Singapore already! yeay! so excited.. and worry as well. haha. worry about spending my $$$. semlm gi tukar duit pun mak aiiii, the exchange rate is RM1 to SGD2.34. *must keep in mind lilia, its all about value of money, huhu* must.not.spend.so.much.then. its not like i’m going to shop at the country where the currency depreciates in value if to be compared against RM kan. so, yeah, shopping kat Malaysia lagi best. there u go, we have another pengguna yang bijak here *a pat on my back* :D oh ye, another thing that worries me, bas pukul 8 pagi laaa pulak.. haihhh bangun pagi pegi keje pun tak seawal tuh. heh. yesterday i was on the phone with Alin, we were talking about our trip to Singapore. both also worried about not being able to wake up that early. heh.

hmm, alang2 nak lunch hour nih, might as well teruskan je lah bermalas2 an kan.. *grin* so yeah, last friday i went to watch Eragon with Kerol and our Gombak friends. went to watch at MBO in Plaza Galaxie Ampang. was a nice movie, but i must say that the transition in between scenes is not as smooth. sceneries pun tak cantik sgt. kire macam far wayyyy behind from LOTR la. but all in all, was a nice movie to watch. the dragon is blue in colour! ;) sangat lah tidak relevan but if i were to do a movie review, i will definitely bring out that fact. haha.

but i have yet to watch Cicakman la.. after my trip to Singapore la jawabnyer baru dapat tengok. haihhh ade org yang tak tengok Cinta pun dah pergi tengok Cicakman tau. :P

alritey. making move for lunch now.

Sunday, 17 December 2006

The one with a dull weekend..

Kenapa ada derita..
Bila bahagia tercipta..

Kenapa ada sang hitam..
Bila putih menyenangkan...


-Berhenti Berharap by Sheila On 7-

sigh. what a weekend. i guess what goes up must comes down.

enough said.

Friday, 15 December 2006

The one with the very first song dedicated to him...

Two very different people
Too scared to get along
Till two hearts meet together
Underneath one sun

One very special moment
Can turn a destiny
And what some would say
Could never change
Has changed for you and me

Cause its all in the way you look through your eyes
And when all is said and done
All of the fear and all of the lies
Are not hard to overcome
It's all in the way you look at it
That makes you strong
We were two (we were two)
Now we are one

We are two very different people
So much to overcome
So why care for one another
When there's so much to be done

'Cause sometimes it's necessary
Just look how far we've come
You could say my friend that it's the end
Or a new tale has begun

'Cause its all in the way you look through your eyes
And when all is said and done
All of the fear and all of the lies are not hard to overcome
It's all in the way you look at it
That makes you strong
We were two (we were two)
Now we are one

And one moment in time
Is all the time we need
Just to make a difference
To make it better for you and me
If you just believe
Oh yeah
Just open your eyes

'Cause its all in the way you look through your eyes
And when all is said and done
All of the fear and all of the lies are not hard to overcome
It's all in the way you look at it
That makes you strong
We were two (we were two)
Now we are one

-We are one by Westlife-


huhuuu i am a person who is against PDA (Public Display of Affection), but heck..sometimes u just have to break the rules.. :P (Oya is so gona vommit blood..haha)

anyway, hmm mase i dedicated the above song to him, we were still friends, a normal friendship like anyone has, who met over friendster in early 2005 after almost 12 years of no contact. we were in the same primary school last time, standard 1 till standard 4. i moved to Kuantan then and we lost touch. heh. funny. but yeah thats how we met.

the life path of two people crossed when all they were looking for was companionship. a plain companionship, not even close to a friendship. for both of them had been through such a rough love life before. it was like the word love has been completely omitted from their life dictionary.

we started of by spending time together after work after 2 months of contact via friendster and sms. within that 2 months we’ve met twice i think – the first one was a dinner at NZ and the second one was a dinner at Hartamas & a night out at Putrajaya afterwards.

life is never a clear and smooth journey, we had our fair share of bumpy roads during the initial stage. he and his own unsettled issues, and me with mine. love really does happen when you least expect it. i guess that says it all about us. we used to spend hours after work at the klcc park doing nothing but just sitting and staring at the fountain. we were like drowned in our own world and too occupied with our own flow of thoughts. its like we were so comfortable with each other even at time of silence. and when we started to open up to each other, we noticed that we had a lot in common. and the more we share, the more we care. from being so ignorant and cold to each other, the feelings started to evolve. but because of our own issue and history, we lived in denial. we challenged our own feelings. we doubted the progress that took place on its own between us. our minds questioned our hearts, and our hearts rejected all sorts of underlying and surrounding reasons. we were like too scared to fall in love. especially me.

but he took the brave steps by letting it out. and yeah i freaked out. and so did he. but we agreed to take things slow. we agreed to go with the flow. after 1 year of friendship, we couldnt agree more, that we were so comfortable with each other that we need each other in life. he completes the imperfect me, and so am i to him. we made a complete puzzle out of the pieces of the broken heart of ours.

and the rest they said, is history... :)

we had our own ups and downs, of course. but i must admit, what he always say is true, that the ups superseded the downs, so lets cherish the ups, and learn from the downs. we are still learning to know each other. to understand each other better. hoping for a smooth journey of love life, in so many years to come, and more.

everyone has their own love story, can you identify yours? because i can.. :)

The one with no particular subject...

yeay its friday... :))))

and today is such a good friday to me. i’ve just finished with this one assignment which i hate it so much, and i am 3 working days away from my year end holiday! weee hooo. tahun depan sudaaah sambung kerja. :P

this year has been very hectic for me. jobs keep on coming in and each one required tight deadline. i hope next year would be much better, in the sense that i dont have to deal with such a rush assignment. i am taking exam next year (sigh!) and i need to finish 5 speeches for my company’s Toastmaster Club in order to be promoted next round (else i’ll be stucked being at the same level but responsibilities keep on building up upon me) and i need to be seconded for 6 months to audit department. gosh. why so many requirements?! oh well, this is the field i chose in the first place. life is no easy. all this requirements to be fulfilled are for my own good future. the one that i myself are uncertain with. but i should play safe. if all else fails, at least i have a cushion to support me. so i’m just gonna bear with it.

in view of the coming christmas, next week we (as in me and those close colleague friends of mine) are gonna have a christmas gift exchange session.. i’ll just consider that as a normal gift exchange session la haa. let them all have the joy of celebrating their christmas and since i am part of the community where majority of them are non-muslim, i don’t see any harm of sharing it with them. after all, we are all living in one harmony place. eceh. :P

alritey. i want to continue with work. it’s a peaceful day today. i’m able to do my own work according to my own pace and plan. no bugger. huhu… and am gona watch Eragon tonight after work with Kerol and our Gombak friends.. and the best part is, i dont have to work this weekend! yeay.

Wednesday, 13 December 2006

The one with mama the (best) babysitter... :)

erghh penatnyer...seharian tengok numbers sampai contact lense nak terkeluar2 dah ni... huhu.. am taking a break now while waiting for Kerol.. he's on his way to come to my office - gonna go for a quick dinner before coming back to office again... haihhh.. what to do..minggu depan dah nak start cuti.. no pain no gain aite.. *counting days* huhu..

anyway, berbalik kepada tajuk utama. apart from being an excellent housewife, my mom looks after some babies too. she babysits neighbours' kids. selalunye the max yang mama jage is 3 - 4 babies, ranging from few months old to 8 yrs old. it depends. mama normally agrees to babysit if the parent sends their baby when she / he is still few months old. mama kate, its easier coz the baby hasnt started to develop certain behaviours yet. so kira macam senang nak bentuk la.

the first baby yang mama ever taken care of was Firdaus, whose family lives on the same street as mine. it was way back in 2000 or 2001 i think. and now Firdaus is already in his standard 2. he’s the only kid yang sampai skang mama jaga, dari kecik sampai la dah umur 8 tahun dah. yang lain2 tuh bile dah reach certain age je, the parent decided that they can take care on their own. or ade jugak yang sebab dah pindah rumah jauh from ours.

anyway when Firdaus was about 1 yrs old or so, dah memang rezeki mama, our just next door neighbour dapat baby boy, Anuar. so Firdaus ade geng baru. Anuar ni tersangat laa comel and naughty. oh well, biase lah kan, budak2. tapi Anuar stayed tak lame, coz when he’s about 2 yrs old mcm tuh, his parent moved out to mane ntah, Ampang Height kot.

but then at the same time Abu came into the picture. yup, u got it right. the name’s Abu. to be exact, Abu Dzar. tapi kitorg panggil Abu je. his family lives on the road perpendicular to ours. Abu ni mase kecik comel jer, tapi kuat nangis. so, that was the time rumah macam meriah jugak la. ade Firdaus, Anuar and Abu, each one at a different age stage. bile Anuar dah takde, tinggal la Firdaus and Abu jer. tapi nenek Anuar is staying 2 houses away from ours, so once in a while we still get to see him especially time raya or cuti skolah.

and tak lame lepas tuh, datang pulak Haikal. haihhh dah memang fated mama asyik jage baby boy jer. hehe.. dah puas jage kitorg 3 beradik pompuan kot. :P Haikal ni even umur mase tuh bape bulan ntah tapi tembam giler. comel sangat! mata sepet, rambut cacak2. tapi tu lah, dia pun tak lame, tak sampai bape bulan je kot, pastu diorg pindah umah..

so it was back to Firdaus and Abu. Firdaus dah started to go to kindergarten, and Abu pun dah tak nangis dah. tapi Abu ni macam pendiam sket, so cam tak syok main ngan dia. hehe. and not long after that, datang la Alif Mustaqim a.k.a Alip. he was so cute !! same macam Haikal jugak, tembam2, mate sepet and rambut cacak2. Alip mase kecik dulu cam takde la besar sangat, tapi memang leh nampak beza dia dari kecik sampai la skang dah umur 2 tahun lebih. Alip ni the comel-est. macam Sin Chan! hehe.

bila Abu dah besar sket, the mother stopped sending him to our house, for there came Abu jr. hehe, serious! Abu dapat adik baru, Abu ape ntah name dia. tapi panggil Abu jugak. and memang in their family kot, Abu jr. ni asyik nangis jer. maybe kat umah dia ramai org (adik beradik dia 9 orang), so dia agaknye biase kene dukung and dilayan kot.

so to date, ade Firdaus, Alip and Abu jr. Firdaus jarang dah duduk umah coz pagi dia pegi skolah kebangsaan, petang dia pegi skolah agama. so its like our house is for him to get change and have his meal. and last week, mama cakap our neighbour next door was asking on behalf of his sister, as to whether mama leh accept lagi sorang ke tak starting next year. mama cakap should be ok, since Abu jr. pun dah nak masuk 1 yrs old. and guess what, its gonna be another baby boy! haha. oh well, my favourite is still Alip.. :) soooo cute and cheeky!

Pic 1 - Alip mase kecik

Pic 2 - Firdaus mase kecik jugak

Pic 3- latest pic of Firdaus and Alip

Pic 4 - more of Alip :)

Pic 5 - and more..

Pic 6 - and more...hehe

Pic 7 - yes, he is so undeniably cute.

hmm, gambar yang lain2 takde dalam collection. sebab mase tu takde camera phone. so gambar sume kat dalam album hard copies.

okie dokie. thats all for now.. :)

Tuesday, 12 December 2006

The one with...expectation..

there's a saying, 'expect the unexpected'.. and there's also a saying, 'try to live without expectation'.. and i personally say, ‘what is life without expectation’.. to me, as much as we try to live without any expectation, the expectation itself is built up on its own out of our conscious mind.. we tend to have expectation when we go through a series of trend / pattern.. i.e. when we are so used with something and we get too complacent with that certain something. being human, we are easily being drawn to the safety and comfort of the familiar surroundings. senang kate, expectation is formed naturally kalau dah ade routine. for example, kalau dah memang tiap2 hari pukul 8.30am mesti ade orang ajak pergi breakfast , so pagi tu kalau lapar cemane pun dalam mind mesti dah terpikir ‘takpe.. jap gi ade laa tu orang ajak pergi breakfast’.. or, another example, it is a society norm that by the time we reach certain age we should already have achieved certain something. automatically we will have that pressure to meet that expectation when the time comes.

so in a way, to expect is human.

but, the twist behind expectation is, do we expect realistically? because, if we don’t, that’s when an unmatched expectation leads to frustration, giving rise to the emotion of disappointment. i mean, of course, if something happens without us expecting for it also can be a total surprise. so it can lead to both sides of emotions.

question is, how to expect realistically? after all, life is full of uncertainties. can some common sense kicks in the chain of thought when we deal with expectation? i don’t know. coz its too subjective. its up to individual. it depends on situation.

things happen when we least expect for it. is it true? could be a yes. could be a no also. there’s a lot of arguments surrounding this one simple statement. so am gonna leave that as an open ended statement. (malas nk elaborate dah sebenarnyer.. hehehe :P )

some quotes regarding ‘expectation’ i found on the net:

Abraham Lincoln: The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time.

William Congreve: Uncertainty and expectation are the joys of life.

Earl Nightingale: We tend to live up to our expectations.

Claude M. Bristol: We usually get what we anticipate.

Brian Tracy: We will always tend to fulfill our own expectation of ourselves.

Viktor E. Frankl: What was really needed was a fundamental change in our attitude toward life. We had to learn ourselves and, furthermore, we had to teach the despairing men, that it did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us.

Benjamin Disraeli: What we anticipate seldom occurs, what we least expected generally happens.

John Lubbock: What we see depends mainly on what we look for.

Brian Tracy: Whatever we expect with confidence becomes our own self-fulfilling prophecy.

Michael Jordan: You have to expect things of yourselves before you can do them.

Brian Tracy: Your attitude is an expression of your values, beliefs and expectations.

Henry Ward Beecher: Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anybody else expects of you. Never excuse yourself. Never pity yourself. Be a hard master to yourself - and be lenient to everybody else.

Norman Vincent Peale: If you paint in your mind a picture of bright and happy expectations, you put yourself into a condition conducive to your goal.

Abraham Maslow: If you plan on being anything less than you are capable of being, you will probably be unhappy all the days of your life.

Horace: Life is largely a matter of expectation.

Katherine Hepburn: Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get – only what you are expecting to give.

my personal belief? go on moderation. i always fear of putting high expectation out of my own life. for i fear of falling. for i am scared of high place. for i fear of falling from a high place. and being left alone at the bottom.

Monday, 11 December 2006

The one with procrastinating...

procrastinating.. or in a simple laymen term - to defer, put off, delay, drag, dilly dallying, oh well u get the idea.. i came across the article about procrastination in micpa magazine for the October issue. how, interesting. procrastinating does not mean being lazy. laziness is procrastination out of control. buy why we tend to procrastinate then? why we keep on sugar coating the consequences of our own last minute behaviors with ‘i work well under pressure’ or ‘things work out when they are done at the very last minute’ when it is obvious that we actually have no choice then? the article in the said magazine was written up in such an exceptionally perfect sense way.

huhu.. and i was dumbfounded after reading it. i really have no idea how to explain that. for i am a procrastinator myself. i dont know why. dari zaman study sampai skarang. hmm.. i'm just being human, a normal human, am i? i mean, everyone, does, procrastinate, to some extend or another... right? right.

Sunday, 10 December 2006

The one with that one particular moment...

yesterday i went back to PD to visit opah with my mom and my brother.. my the traffic was so very teramat highly congested! bayangkan, bertolak dalam kul 11am mcm tuh only to reach PD at about 3pm. what da.. anyhow, opah was in a stable condition, despite looking very pale and weak.. she's getting thinner.. sedih tengok keadaan opah. she barely can move. but she could still talk clearly. so when i reached there, i sat by her, and gave her a rub at her forehead while engaging in some brief conversation. she fell asleep within 15 minits, so i left her to get some sleep as well. got a bit tired from the not-suppose-to-be long journey. when i woke up at 4.30pm later in the evening, i went to her room once again. she just finished being bathed. again i sat by her, and she wanted her hand to be held. so i put her hand in mine, and we talked. again, within half an hour time she fell asleep. maybe she was feeling too comfortable. it was raining outside, and she just got bathed. i tucked her into the blanket and switched off the light. and we left for KL at about 6pm.

that was one hell of a good moment i had. i hope opah can tell that this grandchild of hers, really loves her so much… may she always be in Allah’s care and His bless..

Friday, 8 December 2006

The one with this concern of mine..

its 3pm and its raining outside.. i was doing this market research to support my financial analysis and its so difficult to find information on food emulsifiers (the industry my current client is operating in) until i decided to take a break.. i went for lunch with my colleague Joanne at Secret Recipe just now and we had this really good conversation.. its this thing about life, about love and relationship for that matter..

i shared with her how i always have this thought about the way i find its hard to express my feelings towards my loved ones.. especially family. as much as i’m close to mom, i find its hard to say that i love her and let her know that whatever i do, she’s always be put as top priority…as much as i’m having a good relationship with my siblings, i find it difficult to let them know that this eldest sister of theirs do really care.. as much as i’m physically and emotionally distant from dad, i find it almost impossible to utter the word love, let alone letting him know that i do concern about him.. as much as i’m aware that my grandparents love me so much, to the point my siblings used to get jealous by the attention opah and atuk showered me when i was a kid for i am their first grandchild, i find that i always fail to show that i am physically & emotionally care for them.. i just, dont know how to. i dont know about other people. but apparently Joanne is of the same view as mine. the same chain of thought to some extend. that gives me a bit of comfort though.

and as much as i am not being expressive enough, my action cant compensate that either.. i mean, i'm giving my best i could. tapi rase macam tak cukup. AND as much as i’m aware of all this, i still cant bring myself into being such an expressive person. one thing for sure, i know i am good with words when it comes to writings. i’m more than able to let my feelings out towards these important people in my life when it comes to sms-es, emails, cards, etc. but, i know, action is louder that words. *sigh* therefore this has been an increasing concern of mine. especially with opah and atuk getting older and older now they are so weak and start to be in a poor health state. is it because the way the family is brought up that i become like this? or is it me? and i am a self proclaimed sensitive and emotional. but why cant i express myself with action and words out loud? why its all limited to texts....?

and just how odds things can be, I suddenly received a forwarded email containing this:

I ran into stranger when he passed by,
“Oh excuse me please” was my reply.

He said, “Please excuse me too;
I wasn’t watching for you.”

We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.

But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old.

Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.

When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
"Move out of the way," I said with a frown.

He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.

While I lay awake in bed,
God's still small voice came to me and said,

"While dealing with a stranger,
common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse.

Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.

Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.

He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."

By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.

I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
"Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.

"Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.

I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue."

I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway."

I said, "Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."

FAMILY
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company
that we are working for could easily replace us in
a matter of days.
But the family we left behind will feel the loss
for the rest of their lives.

And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
into work than into our own family,
an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think?

So what is behind the story?

the above really gave me goosebumps.. *sigh* and that reminds me of this one quote from the movie Cinta that goes:

"kadang2 orang yang paling kita sayang lah, yang susah untuk kita sayang....".

i know i am learning to be more expressive, very hard. its very difficult but i just hope that its never too late.. and i'm counting on a mutual understanding from these people, that i do, and i mean i really2 do, love them and care about them so much.....and the same goes to my other loved ones - friends and the other half...

Wednesday, 6 December 2006

The one with me being defensive towards career advise... *uhuk*

The Career Coach section of Cleo Malaysia magazine December 2006 issue catches my attention. and as always, sharing is caring. so here goes:

Are you wasting work time? If you answer “YES” to most of the following, you need to start managing your work time more efficiently. So, do you:

1. usually talk to one or two friends on the phone when you are at work?

(me (and my defense of course): hermm.. sometimes i do.. when i am bored to death and when my stress level is building up..)

2. often have a mess of papers spread all over your desk?

(me (and my defense of course): yes, when i’m doing work. need to refer to a lot of documents laa.. but after work, nope, i am such a neat freak.. :P )

3. find that today’s “to-do” list often looks similar to yesterday’s?

(me (and my defense of course): if i were to look from a macro level, yes. providing technical advise to client in a form of report cannot be done within 1 – 2 days okey.)

4. read funny or chain-mail emails that friends send you?

(me (and my defense of course): laa..abis tu dah ade prompt message ‘you have a new email’.. but i will definitely ignore if i can tell from the title that its really a junk email)

5. often arrive at work late in the morning?

(me (and my defense of course): yes, only if i burnt the midnight oils the day before)

6. spend lots of time gossiping or joking with colleagues when you should be working?

(me (and my defense of course): yes, during lunch hours. and, err.. okey.. sometime, throughout the day via sametime (office messenger). i mean, hello, who doesn’t?)

7. often find that you arrive at meetings having had no time to prepare?

(me (and my defense of course): gile ke ape tak prepare? so yeah, no way. )

8. listen to the radio while you work?

(me (and my defense of course): yes, when i work on numbers. but when i work on write ups, nope.)

9. pick up the phone whenever it rings?

(me (and my defense of course): office phone? of course laaa.. kang tak angkat, people around mule angkat kepala sorang2 looking annoyed with a "sape punye call tu, angkat aaa" statement read on their face expression .)

10. talk to anyone who stops by your desk needing help?

(me (and my defense of course): yes. i’m a friend-in-need-is-a-friend-indeed type. lagipun dah kalau yang datang mintak tolong tuh is higher level person, takkan nak buat bodo jer kan?)

11. always end up finishing reports or work duties at the last minute, under pressure?

(me (and my defense of course): hmm, ok, it’s a yes. but hey, we are talking about the whole chain of people here. and you are part of the chain. so, how not to finish work at the last minute??)

12. feel like you have to work back way more than you should?

(me (and my defense of course): a straight no. no turning back.)

well, i am not playing a blame game here. but, i was just wondering, ade ke employee in this whole freaking world yang can answer NO to most of the above?

Alritey. i have got time management to do here :) Have a blissful wednesday!

Tuesday, 5 December 2006

The one with me being a good employee today... :P

i feel so good today - managed to accomplish my to-do list. erghh so tired now. having a neck pain and backache after long hours spent sitting at my work place. eyes are also so annoyingly dry now due to extensive hours spent staring at the laptop screen. i was working on numbers today - i love numbers. there's no way i could move when i'm working on numbers unless they are all balanced / reconciled / make sense.. :)

now its almost 6pm and i’m all out. waiting for Kerol to come over to my office. we are going to One Utama after this to watch movie.

okie dokie. gotta go and pack my things. hopefully tomorrow is gonna be another productive day for me. there wont be so many people in office (including she-who-must-not-be-named here), which means less distraction. *wink* alritey, calling the day off now.

Monday, 4 December 2006

The one with me taking a break from work...

its monday and its already 8++pm and i'm still in office...but dont get me wrong, i'm not complaining over here.. its my decision to stay back today.. its me & my work time.. need to do some catching up..

i just got back from dinner at Ampang with Kerol.. yummy, finally my cravings for the cheese naan + tandoori chicken (from the stall opposite to Ampang Point) are being satisfied.. :)

i had quite a peaceful Monday today – no Monday blues. woke up early, traffic was clear, reached office before 8.30am (and yeah why on earth there were no directors around when i’m faithfully observing the official working hours eh?) and had breakfast with my colleague Parveen and Joseph from the IT dept at the stall behind office. Joseph helped me to format my external hard drive. yeay, now i am so technology-equipped. haha.. managed to get a good one at a reasonable price yesterday. PC Fair was damn packed with people. haihhh.. baru masuk gaji dah abis ke bende2 nih ler plak.. oh well, its about time pun kan to have all this.. bukan saje2 nak membazir shopping tak tentu pasal.. (an attempt to comfort ownself).. but later i really need to watch out on my spending. am gonna start my year-end leaves soon, starting from this 21st of Dec 2006 till the first week of January 2007 (annual leaves cannot be carried forward, hence the leaves clearance).. so far i have two plans in place – going to Singapore with my high school girlfriends and going to Penang for my colleague Eddie’s wedding.. a lot of ka-ching to be put aside for that purposes.. huhu.. ini pun berkira2 untuk abiskan the MC leaves allocated for us the staff. out of the 14 days i think i’ve utilised more or less 5 – 6 days jer.. hermm.. *grin* tapi cam susah jer.. we shall see..

alritey.. i shouldnt be doing things that would defeat the purpose of my intention to stay back. gotta continue with work. signing off for now..

Sunday, 3 December 2006

The one with the PC Fair...and my bestfriends' engagement day...

i went to PC Fair last Friday and yeay !! finally i have my own digital camera now.. well, not so much of mine alone, coz am sharing it with Kerol ---> "harta sepencarian" kekeke.. anyway, we managed to buy the camera with a good deal. i've never been to PC Fair before, never thought its quite interesting. apart from the digital camera, i also bought one mouse for my office laptop (the trackpoint on HP's laptop not as nice as IBM's one..), one FM modulator (the thing you put in the car so that you can insert thumbdrive - so cool, i dont have to worry about having to incur cost of buying a CD player for my car anymore to play songs!) and one 1Gb thumbdrive. Kerol on the other hand bought some cables for his company and he was really good at bargaining.. heheh.. favourite ayat dia nak membodek that day was "boleh laa lengluiiii..".. ceh.. kate most of them were salesgirls.. satu bende je tak sempat nak survey, external hard drive. hmm, i might be going later today..its the last day of PC Fair, hopefully i can get even a better deal. counting on Kerol's skills to bargain.. :P

the next day, i.e. yesterday, i went to Ipoh with Kerol, Oya & Karim.. my two bestfriends - Famie & Muni, were getting engaged.. i was so happy for them.. reached there at about 1pm and headed straight away to Muni's room.. Karim & Kerol waited outside of the house, lepak at the couch.. Muni was sitting in the room, so beautiful in her sweet orange+peach coloured baju kurung.. there were some other friends of mine (selain Oya) as well - Irna, Yumi & Fadzilah waited together with Muni in the room. i was so excited to see them.. hmm, i'm gona let the pictures tell the rest of the story that day..*wink*

Sampai2 jer terus gi posing with Muni in the room while waiting for the rombongan from Famie's side.







The other girls who were waiting in the room as well, from left to right: Oya, Irna, Yumi, Fadzilah, and err.. Muni's friend.. not sure the name..




Part of the hantaran from Muni's side.. they chose peach / orange as the colour theme.



Famie and his rombongan were scheduled to reach by lunch time. but due to some reasons, they reached slightly late. Kerol and Karim siap dah mabuk sirap kat luar menunggu.. hehe..



The girls kat dalam bilik pulak dah abis boring, ape lagi... berposing ler to kill the time, and also to cheer Muni's up.. This is the picture of Irna & Muni trying to give a 'natural' pose.. not badddd.. :)



Finally, sampai pun si Famie ni haa..this is the picture of all of us, after the two families closed the deal, and after sessi menyarung cincin...



Part of the hantaran from Famie's side.. so nice, they were all blue in colours.. :) and at each of the hantaran mesti ade this one blue butterfly.. so cute and beautiful..

Alhamdulillah, everything went well that day despite of some hiccups in between here and there.. biase lah, nothing is perfect and we cant please everyone kan.. so, all in all, yang penting, the two of them dah selamat dah ditunangkan (congrats!!), and insyaAllah, they will be getting married next year.. wishing them one happy and blessed relationship..

Alritey, i need to get ready to go to PC Fair...damn the traffic (both cars and people) is gona be so bad.. Sunday + PC Fair + KLCC + school holiday = bad traffic. but i really want to reap the benefits of the PC Fair.. i want to buy external hard drive.. so heck, bring it on! hehehe..

Friday, 1 December 2006

The one with the wacky friday, that is..

To the beat of my
To the beat of my
To the beat of my heart

I'm thinking about,
Letting it out.
I wanna give in,
I wanna go out.
Been looking around
I've finally found,
The rhythm of love,
The feeling of sound.


It's making a change,
The feeling is strange.
It's coming right back.
Right back in my range.
Not worried about anything else,
I'm waking up

To the beat of my,
To the beat of my,
To the beat of my heart.

[Chorus:]
The beat of my heart,
The beat of my heart,
The beat of my heart,
It tears us apart.
The beat of my heart,
The beat of my heart,
The beat of my heart,
Now I'm back to the start.
To the beat of my,
To the beat of my,
To the beat of my heart,

I'm up from my down.
I turn it around.
I'm making it back,
I'm not gonna drown.
I'm taking a stance.
I won't miss a chance.
I want you to see
I'm not scared to dance.

The way that you feel
Could never be real.
I want you to know I finished the deal.
So I'm sayin to you
I'll always be true.
To the rhythm inside,

To the beat of my,
To the beat of my,
To the beat of my heart,

[Chorus]

Away Away,
Away Away,
Away Away,
Away Away,
Away Away,
Away Away,
To the beat of my,
To the beat of my heart,
Away Away,
Away Away,
To the beat of my,
To the beat of my heart,

- To The Beat of My Heart by Hilary Duff -


Yeah, i'm OK now.

Abby is right, its a Wacky Friday. It can go both ways. The fun side of wacky, the disturbed side of wacky.. :) i was a so much disturbed this morning.. but now i am more composed.. and i can say, yeay its friday!! (heck its wacky friday, that is..)

anyhow, i just got back from lunch at sushi king with Oya. she's just got back to work after 2 weeks of study leaves.. sigh, people all taking exams.. and i'll be back on the same track next year.. really hope everything goes well then.. (keeping my fingers crossed)

later this evening am gonna go to the PC Fair with Kerol. if luck is on our side, we'll be having a new digi camera... yeay! hmm but as for now, i'd rather keep my excitement aside first. kang tak jadi beli kang, buat malu jer kan dah kecoh2 awal2.. :P

and tomorrow am going to ipoh.. my two best friends, Muni and Famie are getting engaged.. (finally!) am so happy for them.. :)

alritey.. i am off to continue doing my work now.. till later...

The one with the gloomy friday of mine...

yeah friday should be a happy day. should be a yeayyy day. its the final day before weekend. but somehow, harini rase gloomy sangat. i feel down. i feel low. negativity is all over me. i feel rejected by the world. sigh.

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways.. yea ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

- Hate Me by Blue October -

Wednesday, 29 November 2006

The one with the sunshine wednesday...

My friend Abby came out with 'sunshine wednesday' and my colleague Jean told me how much she likes the song from Gabrielle - Sunshine.. so i googled for the lyrics and downloaded the song.. and i must say that i enjoy the song as well.. here goes the lyrics:

Made a wish, I can dream
I can be what I want to be
Not afraid to live my life
And fulfil my fantasies

I learnt a lot of tricks to help me live my life
You helped me find my paradise
When you came I saw

Sunshine through my window
That's what you are
My shining star
Sunshine
Making me feel like I'm on top of the world
Telling me I'll go far

Reaching out, for the highs
You inspired me to try
I felt the magic inside
And I felt that I could fly
I'm looking at the world in an optimistic light
You made me appreciate my life
'Cos when you came you were my

Sunshine through my window
That's what you are
My shining star
Sunshine
Making me feel like I'm on top of the world
Telling me I'll go far


You are the calm
I am the storm
You are the breeze that carries me on
When I said a truth
You wink at me
You're there for me

The lyrics are quite nice and meaningful..and it reminds me of another song i always sing to kerol, i mean, read out, of coz, me such a tone deaf...huhu...

You are my sunshine..
My only sunshine..
You make me happy..
When skies are grey..
You'd never know dear,
How much I love you..
So please dont take, my sunshine awayyyy..

Alritey..i'm gona enjoy my sunshine wednesday..before datangnye hujan dan ribut petir..anytime soon...but hopefully not so soon.. after all, weather changes is a life fact...

Tuesday, 28 November 2006

The one with me feeling like blogging...

the title says it all..

just feel like typing my heart out here. it’s the second day of the week and so far things are so good. there were few bumps laa actually lately in my relationship, but i guess that one i myself yang carik pasal.. being emo tak menentu.. sume bende pun seems to be wrong to me.. that reminds me of the phrase from Gubra, that goes “why do we hurt the most, the ones we love the most?” … *isk* anyhow am so glad i’m over it already.. i’m so grateful to have someone in my life who is so patient and who is so understanding.. and i can never feel thankful enough..

last weekend was quite good. was suppose to go port dickson to visit opah with mom but mom suddenly decided not to go coz her sister came down from taiping to stay in the hospital with opah. so mom said that its better for her to come later when no one is around rather than sume datang one shot.. kire macam take turn la.. however, opah is getting better.. not recovering, but definitely slightly better.. as a matter of fact, she has been discharged from icu and now getting treatment in the normal ward..

speaking of last weekend, i went to watch a play at the actors studio bangsar with my colleagues on the friday night.. ‘comedy court’ was ok laa.. kelakar tu kelakar, but sometimes i didn’t get to catch the jokes.. basically they were making fun of whats happening in Malaysia, and they did that by acting as Malays, Indian, and Chinese, one at a time.. so things like politics, the chinese in Malaysia being marginalised issue, the murder case of the model, etc and even about siti and datuk K also being brought up and made fun of.. hm, sounded like rude, though like i said, it was quite funny but definitely there were messages being implied in between.. and the two indian actors were really good in acting and imitating esp.. i mean, of course la kan, kalau tak takkan la they can act in a play.. duh me.

i woke up quite late on saturday coz tak jadi balik PD.. and i just lazed around up till late evening before getting ready to go Ida’s house in Melawati.. she’s my friend when i studied in Taiping and she was having a kenduri and makan2 sempena her brother going to Australia for a 6 months pilot course. went there with kerol and nana, with kerol driving.. on the way there, nana updated me about what happened to this one couple from my batch in uitm.. they broke up.. and the reasons they broke up were really bad.. i thought my case was bad enough but sigh.. so sad la.. its unbelievable how things can happened.. how someone we love, someone we trust, someone we’ve been through ups and downs together, can have the heart to cheat on us.. i mean, people change, that, is perfectly acceptable and understood.. its a fact of life.. but cant things be handled and managed and faced in better ways? kenapa masa nak win the heart stage people can do nicely but then mase nak break up people just simply ditch the other someone? dah amek hati secara baik, pulang cara baik jugaklah, though the substance its already a different story.. oh well, i am being too personal already.. better stop now.. coz i myself dont want to talk so much, later kene kat batang hidung sendiri, i.e. having to be in the shoes of people yang change, baru tau how hard to handle things like that.. *mintak dijauhkan - amin*.. (note that i didnt mention about gender here for i believe guys and girls are equally the same - both can change in heart, and both can contribute to the failure of the relationship..)

on sunday, interestingly i woke up as early as 7am.. perghh normal working days pun tak bangun that early..kui kui kui.. reason being, parveen my colleague woke me up to go jogging.. dah lame dah tak pergi jogging on sunday morning. dulu selalu jugak pergi with kerol especially mase zaman tengah buddy2 lagi.. hehe.. tapi skang for some reasons, we’ve been putting it behind every other schedules.. but he’s so lucky he still got to exercise by playing futsal with his gang.. anyhow parveen and i, we’ve been talking about exercising lately and we might be joining gym as well.. huhu.. tengok lah macamane.. we’ll be going for a free trial one of these days and we shall see.. *wink* so, i woke up and picked parv up and we headed to titiwangsa.. was quite fun though, asyik gelak jer.. we finished one round of “jalk” (jogging, then walking), then we joined the group aerobic.. belasah jer join.. hehe.. but it was satisfying, we were drenched in sweat. after that we went for a light breakfast before heading back home.

at home later, i just lazed around reading newspapers and watched the repeat of ANTM before having my nap at 2pm.. woke up at 4pm and got ready to go kerol’s house. his mother was going to perform Haji so we had to send her to the Kompleks Tabung Haji in kelana jaya.. her flight was at 12midnight. went there with kerol’s younger brother and sister. the other sister was taking spm, so she was at her boarding school. his mother was going to be there in Mekah n Madinah for one month plus..it was so touching to see them bidding farewell to the mother, especially the little sister who couldnt stop crying even until we were in the car going back home later. i could see that the tears kept on streaming down her cheeks. the way the siblings are closely attached to the mother is pretty much the same like mine, given the very much alike of the fact of the case. so i understand how does it feels having to part with the mother. when i reached home that night, i sent one comfort message to the sister, hoping that she’ll feel much better. i mean, that’s the least i could do.

oh yeah that night i had a punctured tire as well.. bummer. dah la aritu keta baru anta gi service.. cost me a good RM400++.. ni tayar plak.. pastu nak kene anta keta gi polish coz there’s this one night i think ade kucing gaduh ke hape on my car coz the next day i found out that there were so many scratches and ade bulu kucing as well berterabur on the body of the car.. erghh!! sabar je laa..

alritey.. am signing off for now.

Friday, 24 November 2006

The one with my all time favourite movie...

i like The Sound of Music very2 much..(except the towards the ending part bile dah takde nyanyi2 dah..) never once it fails to bring excitement, even just by the thought of it..whats more if i'm watching it..other than cartoons, i would watch this movie again and again and again last time. and the memory of having happy feelings watching the movie when i was a kid still vividly remains in my heart and my mind up till now.

the boom of the song by Gwen Stephanie lately entitled "wind it up" kinda brings back the feelings. and this is one of my favourite song from the movie:

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens,
bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens,
brown paper packages tied up with strings,
these are a few of my favorite things...

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple strudels,
door bells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles,
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings,
these are a few of my favorite things...

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes,
snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes,
silver white winters that melt into springs,
these are a few of my favorite things...

When the dog bites,
when the bee stings, when I'm feeling sad,
I simply remember my favorite things, and then I don't feel so bad...

Yup... remembering this favourite movie of mine makes me feel glad that somehow i had good times..not only bad times....

The one with...T.G.I.F

i'm so happy to realise that its already Friday till i woke up earlier than the norm and i reached office at 8.20am.. (sounds early to me! muahaha).. i wanted to be early in office so that the time will just pass by and the next thing i know, its end of office hour. i'll sure be occupied with this one report to be amended and thats gonna kill the time real fast. (woo hoo somebody is so optomistic today). tonight i'm going to watch a play entitled 'Comedy Court' at the actors studio bangsar with my colleagues. hmm..hope its gona be a good (and worth) play to watch! after all, its my friday night, so it better be good then. *wink*

as for now, i'm gonna stop.. and make my move to...BREAKFAST! hehehe... oh well, i've learnt my lesson..kene makan complete meal.. tak kira la kan if its already 9.30am in the morning.

thank God its friday.. :)

Thursday, 23 November 2006

The one with me being...sick

yeah..am so sick..mentally sick..and physically sick.

i am sick of promises given by this one particular person. sick of all the nice words uttered to me. just to make sure that her job is done. cakap it wont take me long but up until now i am stuck with the job. erghh!! am so terribly annoyed until i cant even see her face when i had a review with her this morning.. its 5.20pm now and though i still have a lot of amendments to go, i'll just gonna go off by 6pm the max. i'd rather continue this at home later. if the need arises. else i'll continue this tomorrow. i just cant take it any longer. i need to have some downtime.

and yesterday i was on MC. the day before i kept on vomiting and went to toilet. it was already 12 midnight when i couldnt take it anymore until i had to tell my colleagues that i couldnt continue to help them with finalising the report and compiling the appendices. the least i could do then was to give them a ride back home. coz they both are women and they both didnt drive to work and it was already so late. so after dropped them off at about 3 am (yes, A.M.), i went straight to clinic. i expected i had food poisoning. but much to my disbelief, the doctor said "ohh ini angin ni...".. i was like, hello? i was vomitting like hell till there's nothing more to be thrown up and yet the rationale behind all that was, angin? then i told doctor, "but i had a complete meal today. i even had nasi goreng for breakfast - which is really not me. i cant take such a heavy breakfast".. then doctor dengan muke sinisnye tanye "awak kerja auditor kan? bile time sibuk makan mesti tak menentu.. hari ni ye lah makan.. how abt ur eating pattern say, for the past 2 weeks?"

err i was dumbfounded. to which i replied, "hmm ye lah kot.. angin.. so? tak sakit lah ni yer? muntah2 tuh biase jer ek?".. after that he then nagged about the importance of having meal at the right time etc.. and gave me an injection! waaa dah lame tak kene inject ni. then ingatkan sakit biase jer, pastu doktor kate, "saye kasik awak MC". by then i was settled, that though it sounded so duh, i was actually vomit because banyak angin. huhu.

so yesterday i was on MC. and yet today, i'm not feeling well still. tekak still rase payau and loya. perut lapar, tapi taktau nak makan ape. semlm pun rase macam ni but then Kerol came and brought bubur for me. and at night i had cornflakes with milk. tapi itu semlm, kat umah. arini kat office, ape yang ade? sume makanan berminyak and fastfood. not much of a choice for healthy food around the office. cemane laaa i am not sick of food as well. bukan saje tanak makan. i normally have milk for breakfast, dont have lunch and have a heavy and complete meal at night. thought its fine.. but apparently its not. haihhh.. pasal makanan pun boleh jadik hal ek...bukan tak bersyukur.. tapi.. haihhh...

sick.. sick.. sick..

oh yeah i think i am so sick with work until just now, suddenly out of nowhere somebody from audit department, of whom i am not close to at all, Sametime (the Y!M version of this office) me, "askum lilia.. nak tanye ni.. betul ke saye dengar awak dah tender?".. i was like "err..hello?bile mase pulaknyer".. i was so puzzled by the fact people from department lain pun boleh come out with such a story about me.. i insisted him from where did he hear that.. he said " ade lah.. dari sumber2 yang bleh dipercayai..".. i didnt want to engage into the conversation any further so i just replied "no lah.. mane ade...YET.. ".. haha.. and dia plak bleh reply "oh ye ke..takpe lah.. in case u plan to, just let me know.. kalau2 ade opening nanti, i'll inform u.."..

hemmm.. interesting. *grin*

Tuesday, 21 November 2006

The one with the assortment of feelings i had when i woke up this morning..

i woke up as early as 7.30 in the morning despite the fact that i had a late night stay yesterday.. and i reached office just before 9. kalau dulu if stayed back late (not entirely because of me being inefficient during the normal working hours, but because of some other obvious reasons, as obvious as tight deadlines etc.); i would come in office at abt 10 to compensate for it. and also to make sure that i had a good 4 hours sleep at least. but then, last week i was being called into both of my big bosses' rooms at a two different point in time and had a small talk.. a so called friendly and gentle reminder.. of all those latecomers, why me eh? i initially took it emotionally but then when my other stay back late and thus come in late gang started to make fun of it, i was more composed. and i felt the feeling i havent had for so long.. the feelings when i was in mrsm terendak.. when i was having the i dont give a damn attitude, and i know i was not alone. oh my, i really miss myself and the friends around during those days...

and i woke up this morning feeling sick too.. i had too much of coffee yesterday.. morning, evening, and at night.. erghh! tekak ni rase macam payau semacam.. hoping to get rid off this funny taste as soon as possible.

and i woke up this morning still feeling damn pissed off with this one particular guy colleague of mine.. he was so rude and mean and inconsiderate yesterday.. i hate people like that... self centered type of people.. buzz off la wei.. *purple with rage*

and i woke up this morning having a nice feeling as well.. the feeling of lucky being blessed with such a wonderful person like Kerol.. someone who is always there for me. yesterday he kept me a company till 2am until i was done with my work.. i can never thank him for always being supportive.. for always lending his ears for me to nag and offering shoulders to cry on when it comes to me having such a bad day in office..and when i had so much of workloads..

and finally above all, i woke up this morning feeling so grateful for i am still alive.. thank God, Allah the Almighty..

Sunday, 19 November 2006

The one with the open houses..and opah..

hmm so far every weekend in this month of Syawal mesti ade invitation to open house.. and of all those i attended, only two were held by my own friend, the rest were Kerol's friends', of which technically are my friends also la kan, but considered as second tier.. :)

today i attended two open houses, out of five invitation.. haha there you go, lima invitation terus. but i guess its because this weekend marks the last weekend of the Syawal month. so everyone is grabbing the opportunity to hold an open house. yup, Syawal is coming to an end soon - how fast time flies.

went to Hana's house in Ampang first..i was so hungry that time i ate a lot! huhu.. i had everything that being served there..yup that much. i had the nasi minyak with curry chicken, telur masin, sayur timun and popodum; then i had Hana's famous lasagna (finally! hehe..mmg sedap) and i had the carrot slice brownies from secret receipe. as if its not enough to ruin my diet, i even had the kuih raya.. thanks to the guys yang tak berenti2 main PS2 - we ended up spending almost 2 hours at Hana's house..heh.

above L to R: (sitting)Usop, Zarir, Acap, Najib, Panjang, myself and
(standing) Hana, Intan, Fieza
*pic courtesy of Hana*

below: Kerol and Nikman khusyuk main PS2


then Kerol and i actually planned to go to his aunt's house in Shah Alam..but since it was already 4 oclock in the evening when we left Hana's house, we decided to go to Ayu's house in Gombak instead, together with the rest of the gang. by then i was already full. the nasi ayam looked so delicious though but i only had a slice of the Shepherd's pie.. and tasted a little bit of the yummy homemade blueberry and strawberry cheesecake.

i wish i can share more pics here but being someone who has no digi-camera, i shall wait till the others upload theirs and share with the rest..

am so tired now but i'm waiting for the repeat of ANTM at 11pm later..so i'm gonna continue blogging.

opah has not feeling very well lately. the 68yrs old opah (mom's side) suffered the normal sakit tua and especially a very low sugar level in her blood that she fainted now and then, without giving any signals. she was admitted into PD hospital since last Saturday and last Tuesday, mama went there to take care of her. it was so sad to face all this. poor opah, and poor mama as well. she's the only nearest daughter, so she volunteered to go and look after opah in the hospital. past few days i had conversation with mama and everytime i was on the phone with her, she sounded so tired - must be from the sleepless night in hospital. i felt something deep in the heart. some bitter feelings. the feelings of i wish that i can make things better. but i cant. the feelings of helpless.

so past few days i was left home with erin and ajim. luckily ajim wasnt being so fussy about food. he was the youngest, hence the spoilt one.. but i always tend to forget that he's 15. he's big enough to survive when mama was not around, and when erin n i went to work daytime.

papa went back from Penang yesterday. so together with him we siblings went to PD to give a visit to both of opah and mama. mama was just fine - was so relieved to see she smiles the moment she saw us coming in. but opah, she was so weak and looked so pale. mama said opah didnt have the appetite to eat she had to be fed through this one tube inserted into her nose hole. again i felt this bitter feelings in my heart. i felt this whole heart of mine was.. sigh i dunno how to describe. i just felt sad basically. she couldnt talk much. but mama told us that opah was getting better by then. i really wish that she IS getting better. mama and erin spent the Saturday night there while i went back to KL.

this morning when they got back home, i asked about opah. erin said that she was still there in the hospital. and she was in tears when she knew that erin n mama were leaving. sigh. i know mama was torn in between. she had to go back to KL and move on with her life routine..and at the same time she knew opah needs her. she wasnt being selfish, but its never easy to be a single mom. mama is such a strong person and i admire her so much. i told mama, worse come to worst, lets transfer opah to the hospital in KL, so that it would be easier for us. for mama especially.

i wish i can do something to make opah gets better, but i guess itu dah memang ketentuan for her. time past by and everyone is aging. so the least i can do now, is to pray real hard.

Friday, 17 November 2006

The one with the posers.. :P

Alkisah pada suatu petang bertempat di office di jalan raja laut, KL.
So, this is what happened when me and my colleagues had a bad day in office:


yeah. we were goofing around with the bread stick. and we had fun.

but we still had a bad day, thats the fact. oh well, its all in a day's work.

[ background music: bad day song by daniel powter ]